I’m sure you’ve heard the hype.
Enneagram is the next best “personality type” test.
If you want to know more about what it is, I will explain a little bit here, but I encourage you to research it on your own. Just message me and I will give you the run down on how I would go about finding out your type and where to find resources.
So what is it?
The best way I can describe it is that there are nine types.
Each type is given a title based on their deepest desire and biggest fear.
Those two things are what makes you a certain type.
You see, the enneagram isn’t based on what you do but WHY you do it.
You can only be one type, but you can have tendencies of other types, healthy or unhealthy behaviors that look like other types or could aid in mistyping, and a wing type.
It’s quite complicated, but once you research or read up on it, it all makes sense.
And I’m not being dramatic when I tell you that this discovery has changed my life and way of thinking as a whole.
I am now able to deeply uncover WHY I feel a certain way and from there, I have learned coping mechanisms that help me handle and work through those emotions and feelings.
For instance, each type identifies and naturally connects to one deadly sin; mine is anger.
Type 1’s are the Reformers.
We thrive on order and rules.
We want fairness and justice.
Our deepest desire is to be good.
Our biggest fear is not being good.
Not just good like good cooks and good at stuff in general, but good people.
We want to be fair, just, and change the world for the better.
And when things aren’t that way, our natural reaction is to be angry about it.
Reading that literally opened my eyes to what I had been living my life like.
I was angry at all the things I felt were not just (which was a LOT in this sinful world).
For example, being a teacher, I see a lot of kids that don’t have a great home life.
I am told stories of foster kids and just overall terrible things, no child should have to live through.
My instant reaction: anger.
So I thought I hated my job…
I get fire in my soul when I hear about children being mistreated or not eating if they aren’t at school.
I’m sure that makes a lot of being sad or mad, but its a different kind of anger.
That’s a huge part of why I became an educator.
To be a part of the solution.
But that makes me so angry that I can’t take it.
It can also be something as small as someone breaking or “bending” the rules (I hate that term).
In college, the curfew was midnight.
You were supposed to be in your room with the door locked by midnight.
So I, being who I am, made sure I was in my room, door locked plenty before that.
But a lot of people would just be walking in at 12:02. You are probably saying, “Come on, it’s two minutes.”
No. You don’t understand. The rule is in your room at 12. It’s so black and white in my mind.
So that makes me angry!
The thing I blew up about at work a few weeks ago? Expectations and rules were changed AFTER I thought I had been following the rules for three days.
Everything is evolving and changing every minute of everyday with work because of COVID, and I didn’t even notice it leaving me on the edge until I flew off the handle.
But now, reflecting on that, I can remember how I feel when things like that happen, pause, and change my reaction next time.
My husband is a 7. The Enthusiast. The life of the party. The live on the fly guy. The ‘rules are suggestions’ guy.
He married a planner. The live by a schedule girl. The rule follower girl.
Ya. Disaster right?
Well it could have been! But it has been the most beautiful experience of my life. We truly make each other better.
And I really honestly attribute a lot of how I have grown and developed myself over the past year and a half to investing in learning the ins and outs of the enneagram.
I don’t want you to get me wrong. This isn’t the end all be all to solving all your problems.
You’re supposed to outgrow the enneagram. You’re supposed to grow so that those negative behaviors and motivations behind your actions no longer apply.
But it is a huge start in the right direction when you pinpointing your core motivation; taking the first step in outgrowing it.
I’m not an enneagram coach or anything, but I’ve spent a lot of time researching and reading about the different types in order to help friends and family learn and grow.
Message me anytime if you have questions or just want to talk through what you’re feeling!
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